Divorce and Child Support

 i'm curious about the laws reguarding leaving the state of ca (currently in the oc) with my child and the rights the father and i have. the father and i have never been married, never lived together, and nothing has gone to court yet. he is the legal father on the birth certificate. can i leave without his consent? how does child kidnapping/abduction play into this senario?

thanks! 

 

In most cases it is good to get consent, then no further problems can proceed.  You also need to look into, if you already have not, child support papers, for him to pay child support for his child.

 i know it's a good idea to get consent, unfortunatly as much of a dead beat that he is, i know he won't consent, even though he doen't pay child support and see's her once in a blue moon. i have already contacted legal aid and child support services. but i don't want to keep proceeding and go to court now if i can leave and then take him to court from a new residence.

 

How old is the child? How long have you went without child support, and is he in the childs life at all?  If he has never been part of the childs life or helped with any child support, may be easy for you to leave California, I would just hate to see him file any complaints that you left..

our child is almost 4 months old. he's given me $500 cash once for child support. he had agreed to pay $500 every month but isn't doing so well with that. he didn't even want me to have the baby, and we weren't together during the 1st trimester of my pregnancy.  he does see our child but only about once every two weeks for maybe and hour or two. i don't stop him from seeing or spending time with our child. although there is some verbal/emotional domestic violence/harassment so i tell him it has to be some place public. ( i have tons of nasty voice msg.s recorded) i live with my mother and she wants to retire and move out of state. i'd like to go with her because there is no way i could currently live on my own and support myself and my child here. he knows this and has threatened to have the court make me stay in the oc, but hasn't taken any action steps. in my opinion, it's just to be nasty and get revenge since i'm the one that doesn't want to be with him. he has very little interest in our child when we do get together, doesn't know how to interact with them. he mainly focus' on me and trying to win me over. ain't gunna happen. so if legally i can leave, i want to before things get any worse

I beleive you could get papers drawn up for child support, and to be able to leave with your mother, with him not being involved in the childs life much, and you both were never married, child support does need to be drawn up in paper work and signed, that is very important, if he doesn't agree, court will make him.  Also those messages you recorded may be a big help.  Getting a couple lawyers opinions in your area is important.  Also does he pay you in check or cash when he gives you the support?

If it helps, my girlfriend who was never married to the father of her child, was able to move to Hawaii with the child and the father also had to pay child support, not sure if that information helps, but I do know that he hired a lawyer and the lawyer told him that because they were never married to her and there was never a paternity test done, he didn't have much parental rights....hope that helps!

he paid me cash. bad on his part because there is no record of it. but he has his own "business" and everything is cash. he doesn't keep money in the bank. he doesn't pay taxes. he makes plenty to have to report, but his theology is that, if caught, he can just say he doesn't make enough to report. 

i made an apt. with legal aid to discuss this and custody issues so hopefully i will get some more insight to the situation. just have to wait 2 weeks for the apt. i also recieved notice that the ca dept. of child support services opened my case.

 

thanks for all your response and advice

Wonderful, keep us informed.  I will also do some research myself to see if I can find anymore information for you.

You child's father seems like a jerk but that doesn't mean he can't turn out to be a great father. He may need some growing up to do but if you take the child away he won't have a chance to bond. Would you like it if the circumstances were the other way around, not being able to see you child grow up. I undertand you're feeling a lot of pressure with your mother wanting to leave but you chose to have this child and he has every right to have a chance at getting to know his child.