Divorce and Child Support

Hello to all,

  I am new to this forum and have several q's about what I am about to go through. I've been married since 2000 and have two daughters ages 3 and 6. My soon to be ex-wife took the kids and moved back to her mom's house last week and we plan to get the divorce/separation paperwork going next week. I make approx 56 to 60 grand a year (depending on overtime availability) and she is currently unemployed. She used to work as an account executive (outside sales rep) and office supervisor for Fedex, so she is more than qualified to get a decent job when the kids get a little older. We live in California. 

  I have a few questions and would greatly appreciate any feedback. I am a complete novice to divorce/separation and all this hectic stuff. First of all, what is the difference btwn divorce and legal separation? Next, will I have to pay allimony? The only property we own are 2 cars and we've already agreed about who will get which. Next, I know I'll have to pay child support but will they base it upon a 40 hour work week or my gross income for 2007 which included overtime? Also, what is joint physical/joint legal custody? She'll have the kids the majority of the time because I work on Swing Shift (2pm-10pm) and she needs to take them to and from school but I am wondering if I can still have 50% legal power of them while only seeing them on weekends/holidays/etc. 

  Last, and most important of all, has anyone already gone through this whole ordeal from start to finish? My primary concern is for my daughters' well being. I love them more than life itself and I am going to miss them soooo much. If anyone has gone through this with their daughter(s), how did it affect them in the long run? Is it possible for girls to grow up emotionally healthy without their father living in the same household as them? The good thing is that their grandpa is a great man, so hopefully he will provide some of the much needed male presence. After a while, will my daughters still love me, or will they forget about me? Thanks much for any responses.

Alimony has different factors, can be length of the marriage, which looks to be 7 years in your case, and how quickly she can get back into the work force.

 The best thing to do is try to come to an agreement on dividing assets, custody, child support and debts. You'll both save a lot of stress, $$$ and pain if you can both agree and get along. If things go south I suggest getting a lawyer unless you want to do it yourself which is possible as long as your willing to do the research and put the time in; it's definitley cheaper, plus, you get a chance to speak to the judge and having a lawyer doesn't gaurantee anything except $$$. Try to work out a financial solution that both will be satisfied with; I know some couples who worked things out without ever going to court, what matters is the kids are loved by both parents and money doesn't become the sole motive.