July 2008 - Posts
This is an interesting question that actually came from a friend this morning, who is looking into divorce. I am going to combine a little bit of everything into this divorce blog and also child support blog. The question is yes. The amount of everything being paid after the divorce, depends on several different factors of course income of both spouses being a question. Alimony and child support are for 2 different things. Alimony after a divorce is for helping a spouse get back on their feet after a divorce. I just did a blog on alimony after a divorce discussing the 2 types of alimony. Alimony can be for a temporary amount of time after a divorce to help a spouse that has been out of work or even quit schooling to get back into the swing of everything. Child support is for the care of the children after the divorce.
I did explain that finding a good divorce lawyer in this situation is important. She has been without work for 5 years, because her husband did not want her to work, and they have 2 children. I also told her that it is important that honestly the whole family should get some sort of counseling for the divorce process, this is important for any family going through divorce. Things just went bad in the marriage, of course resulting in her looking into the divorce.
So here is a recap of information of how alimony is chosen in a divorce. These all can mix together to tell how much, and for how long after the divorce alimony will be paid.
* Alimony after a divorce can do a lot with physical and mental health of the spouses.
* Alimony after a divorce can depend a lot on how the debts are split in the divorce.
* Alimony after divorce depends a lot on the spouses earnings, this has a huge factor in how much alimony will be paid.
* Alimony after a divorce depends a lot on the age of the spouses.
Now child support and the amount in the divorce, depends on the number of children and also both of the spouses earnings. I have done an amount child support blog that I may recap on for tomorrow.
I know I have been over these divorce programs before, but they can get lost in the shuffle of divorce information. These can also be used if you are looking to even reopen a divorce case, although we have been over what a tough situation that can be to start with, you are going to need some hard evidence to get that one to begin with, but some programs can help. Divorce can be very expensive, and some of us out there just can not afford a divorce now a days, especially with how everything else is going! So here is some basic information on where and how to get a divorce at least a bit cheaper. Now I will say if there is a lot at stake in your divorce, finding a really good divorce lawyer is still very important, and sometimes even divorce lawyers, will let you set up some sort of a payment plan, not always but there is some out there, so look and ask that if you have a lot to stake in your divorce, debt, property, child support and child custody issues. But if still having problems let me go over a few divorce programs.
1. There is federal funded programs for divorce...These divorce cases are usually done with staff attorneys, this helps them get their experience in for being a good divorce lawyer, and you may find out they already are ;) Everyone has to start somewhere.
2. There is pro bono programs for divorce...These are local divorce lawyers, with the local bar association, these local divorce lawyers, have put in to help with pro bon programs, but now to qualify for these, you must be abused, sick or over the age of 65 etc..
3. Self help clinics for divorce, that are also provided by the local bar association, you can call for these, and get legal information and help and also put in the right direction on where to find a divorce lawyer.
4. A courthouse facilitator for a divorce, they can help process your legal claims, some courthouses are offering this, but not all, you need to call your local courthouse and ask if one can help with your divorce.
5. There are low cost legal programs for your divorce...These are offered to people for divorce that either do not have a high income, but yet can not use the pro bono, due to the grounds it takes to use the pro bono for divorce.
6. There is public defender organizations for divorce...in most all states they offer these for divorce, at a very low cost, but you must be at a certain income level.
Remember you can call your local courthouse, and the bar association for this information also to see who is offering this help for divorce.
We have been talking lately about the importance of wrapping up your divorce. We have also talked about how it is so important to research your divorce lawyers, to really find the right divorce lawyer for you. Why it is important to read your divorce papers, and even have a friend or someone you trust to read your divorce papers, especially before you sign anything! Think about the money you have spent on your divorce lawyer, another reason you want your divorce lawyer to be good is well, you are paying your divorce lawyer to get you what you deserve in your divorce, but also you need to take time to know what is going on in your divorce, to read your divorce papers and understand everything that is in them. Lets take a look at what happens, if you really do not wrap up your divorce properly, or your not happy with your divorce. Its not just as easy as looking for another divorce lawyer and reopening a divorce case, it takes a lot to reopen a divorce, hard proof of something wrong in the divorce, not that well I did not take time to really read my divorce papers. So here is all you will have to go through.
1. If you reopen your divorce case, first off you have to appeal to get it reopened, then you have to pay or another divorce lawyer and in most cases, you will have to pay for the divorce lawyer representing your now ex in court.
2 Not only will you be paying for your divorce lawyer, your ex divorce lawyer, you will also have to pay extra for your divorce lawyer to now brief your ex's divorce lawyer on the issues.
3. You will also have to pay several hundred for a trial transcript.
Now taking time to wrap up your divorce properly is IMPORTANT, you do not want to spend extra, just because you did not read over all your divorce papers, or ask questions. Another important thing is that if you reopen your divorce, it really is important to research divorce lawyers out of the area now, so that no conflict comes back into play. So take time to wrap up that divorce properly and READ your divorce papers!
I suppose this is one of the reasons, I stress a good divorce lawyer, and that divorce mediation can be a huge help during a divorce, or also seeing a therapist or talking to someone during a your divorce. Life during a divorce can be high stressed, tempers can rise during a divorce. You may do things you think may get your spouse back, during the divorce, especially if you were not wanting the divorce in the first place, or if you feel sorry for some one. During a divorce no matter how hard things get, you need to be thinking of your future. So again I will stress 3 things for your divorce, good divorce lawyer, at least think about divorce mediation, and talk to someone, wither it is therapy or a good friend, to get things off your chest. So here is a few other things you do not want to make mistakes with during your divorce.
* KNOW what you have property wise, most people go into a divorce not knowing what they owe, what they own, and things get divided, and it is not always equally if you do not know what is going on, so if your getting a divorce, find out what you have!
* AS I stressed in the first paragraph find someone to talk to during your divorce, and also find someone you can trust to read your divorce papers also, its important to read over EVERYTHING in the divorce papers, front to back, and having someone else read over your divorce papers you trust, they may see things you missed due to stress.
* Lots of people don't pay attention to their taxes during or after a divorce, make sure that you do!
* DO NOT BE GENEROUS, to your spouse in the divorce, for feelings of getting them back, or feeling sorry for them. Think about your life after the divorce, you need to take care of you!
* Yes a great divorce lawyer is important, but also make sure you know what is going on also, do not give up total control to your divorce lawyer, you need to know what is going on!
* Yes its important for your divorce lawyer to gather information, but if it is things you can be doing to know what is going on in the divorce, try to gather as much information yourself if you can; one it helps you know where things are going in the divorce.
A person needs to really sit and think during the a divorce about what they want, and try to stay in control of the situation. Yes divorce is hard, but you have a future to think about. Always keep your chin up, when one door closes a window will open.
Dividing property in any divorce can get confusing and there are certain ways of dividing property in a divorce, and each state has its own set of guidelines. Here is just some basic information on dividing property and gives you an over all idea of how it works in divorce.
There is what is called a community property division in a divorce. This means that the spouses will split half of their property 50/50 in the divorce, now that does not mean separate property, and we have talked about what is separate property in a divorce, but let me go ahead and give you a highlight of the separate property in a divorce, now a reminder that I always give when we are talking state to state divorce on property division is that you must keep the property separate from your marital property or it can be split in the divorce, so another important thing to remember is to keep all your information and papers.
*Gifts and inheritance that come from your family, is considered to be a separate property in a divorce. A business that was owned before the marriage can not be split half in the divorce, now if you have commingled some of the earnings from the business and put it in a joint bank account well then that can be split 50/50.
Note: There is nothing wrong with a joint bank account, nobody ever wants to look at their marriage and think it will end in divorce, but it is also good for couples to have joint bank accounts especially for business and inheritance.
Now there is what is called equitable distribution in a divorce. This means everything is divided equitable way...this means fair . So this does not mean a 50/50 split of things on an equitable distribution, but what is fair for each spouse in the divorce, so how do they come up with what is fair, when dividing property in the equitable distribution in a divorce?The physical and mental health of both people in the divorce is reviewed.
*If there is children involved in the divorce, who will have main custody, is considered. They also look at the source of certain assets, who bought, who paid, who brought them into the marriage. The overall physical and mental health is also looked at for how things are split in the divorce. Work history of each spouse, who was the homemaker, who paid the bills now remember this can roll into alimony also. And how long the marriage was before it resulted in divorce.
Remember each state varies on debt division.
I think when divorce mediation is used, it can really help couples move on and settle things a little easier. Sadly I have seen many family members in divorce, it never is an easy process, even or the entire family. There can be lots of fights and upsets, another reason I say therapy is so good to have for an entire family after a divorce, especially if kids are involved in the divorce process, those are the ones it seems to affect the worst. So divorce mediation kind of helps settle the fights and get things settled. My brother unfortunately was divorced 3 times and the last time listened took my advice and they got a mediator to help, and the process went so much better. So lets take a look at the things that a divorce mediator helps with.
* A divorce mediator, stays neutral to both couples in the divorce, looking at both sides of the problems, and then try's to work out what will best work for both spouses in the divorce.
* A divorce mediator can also act as a closer in the divorce, helping to close arguments, they give the best advice and help close what some of the fights are in the divorce, instead of letting things drag out.
* A divorce mediator is used only for as long as the couple wants them. Its not like when you sign up for a divorce mediator they are there for the entire divorce, only if you need them,but if they help solve the problems in the divorce in one day, well then there you have it.
* Both spouses being able to share their problems, stories and information in a divorce really helps both spouses work through the divorce and a divorce mediator can help them see each others views, so that can help with the divorce process a lot. Each couple being able to understand each others problems.
* About 50-80% of all divorce cases that a divorce mediator was used, helped resolve things quicker and then the divorce process did not keep dragging out.
Reading and also seeing some divorce mediation used by family, most spouses are satisfied with how the divorce process went, and they spent less money because for one, they were not dragging their spouse back to divorce court over a problem that was never resolved in the divorce.
This is a huge thing that is overlooked in a divorce. It is also another reason I stress a good divorce lawyer, a good divorce lawyer is going to more then likely ask about your husbands pension and see about how much you will receive in the divorce. Especially if the marriage has been a long one. Not always is it noticed in a divorce, but in most cases a good divorce lawyer is going to look at every thing in the divorce. Alimony in divorce, all your debt in the divorce, and also your husbands pension. Also this is another question that has been asked, can I reopen my divorce case because of your husbands pension, yes you can, especially if no one informed you in the divorce or you had no idea that you could get part of your husbands pension in the divorce, but again, reopening a divorce case even for pension is tough, but there is an application for it. So lets take a look.
1. First off if your going to reopen the divorce for your husbands pension, you are going to have to have some VERY detailed papers on why, and how, basically that you did not know and your divorce lawyer never informed you, like I said reopening a divorce is a very touchy subject.
2. There will be a legal brief to convince the divorce courts to reopen the divorce case for the pension that you had no idea you could get,and it needs to be an excellent brief.
3. You will have to submit a CIS form.
Again a wife receiving her husbands pension after a divorce is not a punishment. I sometimes get so very upset hearing people fight that another person is a gold digger especially after 25 years of marriage. Marriage does not always last, and of course results in divorce, but each person does deserve a fair share in the divorce. Remember if you are going through a divorce, make sure to ask your divorce lawyer about pension.
Divorce is a very serious thing, it should be taken seriously even when you are completely finished with the divorce and wrapping up all the strings attached to it! If things are not done correctly they can leave things open in the divorce that one can come back to bite you later down the road, especially if you do not sign your name off things. So remember that wrapping up the divorce is just as important as researching divorce lawyers, finding a good divorce lawyer, and the divorce process. You must tie up all those lose strings at the finalization of the divorce. So lets take a look at the things you need to do, to wrap up your divorce correctly.
1. We have discussed this before, in that you need to take time to read your divorce order, carefully, all the way through the divorce papers, every inch, it may even be important to get someone you know to also read your divorce papers, someone you can trust, to make sure there is nothing you miss in the divorce papers, that will one send you to want to reopen your divorce. We have discusses reopening divorce cases and that can be an extremely rough process. SO READ your divorce papers, and ask your divorce lawyer questions on things, do not be left wondering about anything in your divorce order.
2. If you see typing mistakes in your divorce order, those can be changed easily and they are very important.
3. Make sure that you get everything signed over that needs to be signed over in your divorce. If you need to sign off things make sure they get done right away, as does your spouse.
4. Make sure that in the divorce papers, you are getting what you thought you were, if there is property it will be labeled in the divorce papers I stressed in 1. to read your divorce papers, these are the things you need to be looking for when you read your divorce papers, is that you are also getting what you asked for in the divorce.
Remember if you do not wrap up your divorce correctly or find things, you will have to appeal it or go back and reopen the divorce case, which both are very time and money consuming, so make sure to read those divorce papers, and make sure you do not see mistakes.
We have really gotten into the importance of your divorce lawyer over the last couple weeks, the importance of researching divorce lawyers, why a divorce lawyer is important. Why having a divorce lawyer handle your case instead of being on your own in a divorce is important, especially if there is a lot at stake in the divorce. Now we are going to discuss, the responsibilities that come with your divorce lawyer, and the divorce lawyers responsibilities for you. Remember a divorce lawyer or any lawyer can be turned over into a bar association if they have done something wrong, an important thing to remember here is, if you get mad something happens in your divorce, do not turn a divorce lawyer in for something dumb. Your divorce lawyer works hard for you, unless they have done something that you know is wrong, that's different, but even though divorce is a hard time in everyone's life, don't hurt others, if your having a bad day. So now comes the responsibilities for your divorce lawyer and you, this also may help you to get what you need in the divorce. TRUTHFULNESS, all the way through the divorce is your main importance, and will be listed in the your divorce responsibilities to your divorce lawyer, so here they are.
1. Remember to supply your divorce lawyer with ALL your contact information, this helps all the way through a divorce, if your divorce lawyer needs to contact you at any moment.
2. ALWAYS, be truthful about all the information you are giving your divorce lawyer.
3. Its important to always be available for your divorce lawyer on all the legal proceedings, this helps on your part, to get what you deserve in the divorce, if you do not show up for these in the divorce proceedings, it looks like you just do not care.
4. Pay your legal bills on time.
Now here are some of your divorce lawyers responsibilities towards you as the client.
1. Your divorce lawyer must research all the legal issues that are in your divorce case.
2. Within bounds of law, your divorce lawyer must represent you.
3. There should never be any personal relationship between you and your divorce lawyer.
4. Your divorce lawyer must keep all of your divorce information separate from any other cases or divorce cases.
5. Your divorce lawyer must follow all the information you give them on the divorce, remember ALWAYS be truthful about the information you give your lawyer, this can backfire in court, if you do not tell the truth.
6. Your divorce lawyer has a loyalty to you and must keep everything in the divorce completely confidential.
7. Your divorce lawyer must communicate with you on everything going on in the divorce in a timely manner and never wait days to tell you what's going on.
Talking yesterday about reopening divorce should give a few highlights to how important your divorce lawyer is. Now I am not saying you can not do a divorce yourself, handle your divorce yourself, or save money by handling the divorce yourself, but there is things a person needs to look at if handling a divorce themselves, and I believe we talked about this side of divorce last week, is that it really does depend on what is to be lost in your divorce, what is at stake in the divorce, is there a lot of property and debt in the divorce. If the marriage was short and there really is nothing much to split up in the divorce is one thing, but if you have a lot to lose in the divorce, you may be saving money by hiring a divorce lawyer, so that you do not get caught with things in the divorce you do not want, because you had no idea of how to handle that part of the divorce. So there is couple reasons for the importance of your divorce lawyer. There are so many other important things to having a great divorce lawyer by your side, I could probably sit here all day and keep going, but highlighting a few of the important things about a divorce lawyer will hopefully help a few people see how just important it is to have a divorce lawyer by your side in this time. A divorce lawyer is the one person that is not scared to stand up in court and share your rights. A divorce lawyer helps you collect information you never knew you were going to need. A divorce lawyer makes sure that debt and property are going to be split in a fair way, and help get what is rightfully yours in the divorce.
So take time to look around before you try doing a divorce yourself or think that researching divorce lawyers is not important. Its very important to have a great divorce lawyer at your side. Take a few extra moments to research a few.
Ok, I think it is time to go back over this a bit, and also highlight the importance of a good divorce lawyer. Also researching information on a divorce yourself is important. One reason may be so handy to read some information, before ever selecting a divorce lawyer. A good divorce lawyer is so important, I do not think I can ever ever stress that enough. Also seeing past mistakes made by my family members, when they went to select a divorce lawyer. The one thing that seems to be on all peoples mind at the time of a divorce, is get the divorce over as quickly as possible, that is not always the best movement in a divorce, especially if there is a lot at stake in a divorce. Most the time reopening a divorce case takes almost pulling teeth, you just can not say, I want to reopen my divorce case because it was just unfair, or my divorce lawyer should have told me this. You have to have hard evidence to reopen a divorce case, that there was extreme unfairness, fraud, etc. So let me stress it one more time, research your divorce lawyers. Everyone no matter, don't care what you say, is stressed during the time of a divorce, we don't think properly, and that is one of the things the divorce lawyer is there, to make sure that no one is taken advantage in the divorce, that it is done fair. Even if the divorce takes a little extra time, taking the few extra moments to research your divorce lawyer is important.
So now reopening a divorce yes it can be done, but again hard evidence is what you need to reopen the divorce case, and well in most divorce cases that have been reopened, you actually getting what you want is hard. So as I say its always good to try to get a divorce done right the first time around. Now if you are misunderstanding something in your divorce papers, the divorce case can be reopened to explain what is in the papers. But if you think you didn't get what you want from your divorce, unless you have hard evidence, of unfairness, misconduct, fraud, etc....the divorce case will be hard to reopen.
Selecting your divorce lawyer is important, so many people take that part for hmm granted? Finding a good divorce lawyer is the well most important thing you will ever do in your divorce, Research is the main key in finding your divorce lawyer, I have stressed that many times. You can not just pick the first divorce lawyer you pull out of a hat, it is so very important and I will stress it again. A good divorce lawyer knows and has a good record of getting people what they need in a divorce, a good divorce lawyer will keep you informed and work with you through the divorce. So yes take time to talk to several divorce lawyers, take time to look at their back ground in divorce, their divorce cases...etc. I would rather spend a few extra weeks researching a good divorce lawyer then choosing one that I have to look for another one to get back into court to reopen the divorce.
So after you have chosen your divorce lawyer, let me give you a few important steps and things you need to give to your divorce lawyer. These are the things your divorce lawyer will need from you. so that anytime during the divorce process they can reach you.
* Your divorce lawyer will need your home address.
* Your divorce lawyer will need the address from where you work.
* Your divorce lawyer will need your home phone, cell phone, pager, and work number, this helps your divorce lawyer to contact you at any moment if needed.
* Your divorce lawyer will also need if you do have a fax number, this makes it easiest on you and your divorce lawyer through the divorce process, to send you information you need to get now. If not an email can help out also.
I hope all my blogs help the divorce process a pinch easier and maybe help you choose the right divorce lawyer along the way.
Very important! You hear the question a lot from people, do I really need a divorce lawyer? How important is a divorce lawyer? Can I just handle My divorce myself? Do I have to really hire anybody to help me with my divorce? Ok first off, I say yes to it really, but let me explain my thoughts and information I have read on divorce. Finding the right divorce lawyer is like the one person you can trust during a divorce to get you what you need. Divorce lawyer is not scared to stand up in divorce court for you and stress your points. Divorce can be very stressful and honestly handling it by ones self can get sometimes a bit to overwhelming and you do not do all you needed to in the divorce to get what you needed, or missed something in the divorce, and now your looking for a divorce lawyer to reopen your divorce case. I have stressed how important it is to research your divorce lawyer, maybe even have several free consultations with divorce lawyers and see which one seems to work best for you and want to work for you along with the divorce lawyers back ground. Now with that being said, I think if it is a simple divorce, let me rephrase that, if there is not a lot at stake such as is there estates involved, is there kids involved, is there a lot of unpaid debt, because in divorce court the divorce lawyers do work together to split things equally, so basically if there is not a lot at stake, maybe it was a short marriage, then a do it yourself divorce, may be what you need to fit your needs.
Take a look at what is at stake in your divorce, is this something you want to be handling all by yourself along with everyday stress? Getting overwhelmed can make you miss something, that's why a divorce lawyer is so important. The divorce lawyer handles the situation for us. Even though we need to be there to gather information for our divorce and help put things together, a good divorce lawyer fight for what is fair in the divorce.
Every state is different when it comes to divorce grounds in that, there is no fault based ground divorce, and then both fault based grounds. Not all states carry both, some do. Depends on which state you live in to how divorce can be governed on divorce grounds. You will see as you read blog postings for states, each one is different. So let me give you a list of the fault grounds that divorce can be granted on, but again it can vary on which state will carry these, a lot of states just do no fault...so that it is not a long drawn out process.
* Adultery is a fault based divorce ground.
* Insanity or other mental disorder can be a fault based divorce ground.
* Indignities, is a fault based divorce ground.
* Imprisonment, is a fault based divorce ground.
* Bigamy is a fault based divorce ground.
* Cruel treatment, or extreme abuse, is a fault based divorce ground.
* Desertion is a fault based divorce ground, now on desertion, each state that does carry the both fault divorce grounds, has a certain length of time you have to be deserted, to be able to file for divorce.
Then we fall into no fault based divorce, this is pretty simple, basically spouses can not run around pointing a finger, saying they did this, or they did that, no fault based divorce, both spouses agree with the divorce, and that there is no future repair to the marriage, or no prospect what so ever that the spouses can get back together, and then this results in divorce. I have read through many states that just have the no fault base for divorce. Sometimes it can make things a little more simple, where other times it can not. The important thing to remember is finding the right divorce lawyer, that can explain your rights and give you the information you need and handle the divorce correctly.
First off I hope everyone had a safe and happy 4th of July weekend, and mine run a little over, but here we are on a bright and sunny Tuesday. I always hope that in my daily work, that I can help someone, or make some ones life a little less complex. So today I want to give some tips for if you are planning a divorce, or a separation, things that you need to do to help your life go a bit smoother, one in the transfer and to also better your life.
1. First off if you are getting a divorce or separation, one of the best things to do is to open your own checking account, one this gets you set up for daily life, but also in a divorce, money can easily be transferred to your account.
2. Not everyone likes credit cards, but if you have no credit of your own, and your starting out now on your own after a divorce, or preparing life for after divorce, its now time to get some credit of your own, and you can start with things such as credit cards.
3. In any life changing event, wither divorce or what not, seeing a counselor is important, it can help you through the transition of divorce. And help any feelings that just need to get out.
4. Also if your thinking of separation or divorce, make sure to collect a copy of things to be able to give your divorce lawyer and put them in a safe spot, things such as debt info, papers on what you own etc.
5. Divorce is also a time, if you do not have a job, its time to start looking for one to be able to support yourself.
6. Health insurance, if you do not have health insurance, when getting a divorce is time to look into it, if your spouse had health insurance on you, you can sometimes get the coverage for a certain amount of time after a divorce, until your able to get another.
7. Also last but not least if getting a divorce, make sure to also put other documents such as prenuptial agreements, agreements between you and spouse, even property shared in a safe place outside of the home.
Hope a few of these things help someone in a divorce
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